generic boy meets boy
by AnneHarper
Summary: Once upon a time there was a jackass. He lived in a shithole apartment littered with empty beer bottles and bloodstains. His name was Wade Wilson and damn if there wasn't a more depressing way to live. He didn't try to make friends or bother to talk to anyone, until an idiot moved in across the hall. An idiot with a nice ass and a smoking hot set of legs.
1. Chapter 1

Once upon a time there was a jackass. He lived in a shithole apartment littered with empty beer bottles and bloodstains. His name was Wade Wilson and damn if there wasn't a more depressing way to live. He didn't try to make friends or bother to talk to anyone, until an idiot moved in across the hall.

 _An idiot with a nice ass and a smoking hot set of legs._

"Crap." Peter muttered under his breath bending over for the keys that had just tumbled onto the floor in front of his new apartment. He heard an appreciative whistle come from down the hall and he froze.

"That's a nice ass you've got there baby boy", said the stranger who shot him a ridiculously beautiful smile. Oh yes, Peter saw the scars, it would be hard to miss them, but that smile, it was doing things to him he hadn't felt since his break up with, Gwen 'I-always-said-she-wasn't-good-enough-for-you' Stacey, as his Aunt liked to say. He could actually picture his Aunt's mouth twisting to form that sentence, having heard it at least once a week for a couple of months.

"Well, I... uh... thanks?" Peter fumbled with his words, not sure if what the man said had been creepy or just some sort of odd ice-breaker.

 _'I seriously need to work on those social cues I somehow missed growing up.'_ Peter thought hopelessly and decided to smile at the man in an attempt to smooth over the awkward answer he had given.

The smiling stranger's eyebrows shot up, as if he was not expecting that response at all. His face smoothed out quickly and he gave Peter an appreciative once over before walking closer, opening his own door, and saying over his shoulder, "I'll see you around kid."

Peter stared at the door across the hall. Room 114. He wondered what kind of man lived there, he seemed nice enough, a bit crude though. Definitely not the sort of person Peter was used to.

 _Which is exactly why I moved here._ He nodded his head and smiled again, _Come on Peter, you've got this. Meeting new people isn't that bad, it's the whole reason you moved!_

He unlocked his own door and walked inside his new home.

He sat himself on the couch, already feeling at home in his new apartment. He sent a quick text to his Aunt letting her know he was done settling in and asked her what time would be good to set up a dinner, so she could come and see his new home.

His Aunt May was the one who helped him decide to move away from Queens. She said the move would encourage him to go out and make new friends in the world. Peter knew he was a little awkward and shy when he met new people, but he needed to make some sort of effort to have some sort of social life here. He just didn't know how.

He worked from home as a programmer, while the pay was pretty good, it didn't make it any easier to meet new people.

He had left everyone from his old town behind after Gwen cheated on him with his ex-best friend Harry.

Mary-Jane and Harry had been his only friends, he and MJ dated for a bit until they both realized it would be better for them to be friends. Well, that wasn't quite right. MJ decided they would better off as friends and he just smiled and nodded his head. Like he always did. Their relationship was mostly just Peter agreeing with her about everything. He just didn't have the heart to tell her no.

Then Gwen had come along, and he was head over heels for the gorgeous blonde. It was wonderful, she got along with his ex-girlfriend and his best friend. She was sweet and kind to him, asked him his opinions on things, and always greeted him with a smile. His Aunt May came to him with concerns, that in his eyes, were unfounded. He had thought she was just being over-protective. So what if Gwen and Harry spent a lot of time together? It was his girlfriend and his best friend, he had nothing to be worried about.

They had a whole year of happiness before Harry and Gwen decided to hook up. It had crushed him, seeing his best friend and his girlfriend hold hands and tell him they were in love. He remembered thinking, "Aunt May was right", before running to MJ looking for a shoulder to cry on, but she and Gwen had become really close friends and somehow, she had been convinced that the cheating was all Peter's fault. She was incredibly angry when he told her she was wrong, but he guessed suddenly having a backbone would make for a surprised and angry MJ after all the years of smiling and nodding at her.

He was all alone at home and after a long talk with his Aunt May they came to the conclusion that Peter need to meet more people and make better friends, so here he was.

He popped up off the couch and got started on making himself some dinner when an idea popped into his head. He rushed to his bedroom and quickly wrote the note before his brain could tell him not to. He carefully cracked open his door and tiptoed across the hall to room 114. He slid the note under the door and ran like hell back into his apartment, slamming the door and completely ruining his efforts to be stealthy.

He leaned against the wooden door and took a shaky breath before straightening himself up and adding more ingredients to his pasta that was cooking away on the stove top.

About half an hour later Peter was setting the table, for two. He checked the time, 7:30. Running his hand through his hair he walked into his bedroom to check himself in the mirror when he heard a knock.

Rushing to the door he stood on his toes to look out the peephole.

He opened his door to a grinning man standing in his doorway.

"You wouldn't have anything to do with this note, would you baby boy?" The taller man said with a wink.

Not sure If I'll keep writing this, let me know if you think this could go anywhere. thanks for reading!

\- Uh, I just realized Aunt May is a total mother-hen and protective badass and I am completely ashamed of myself for forgetting that. I hope this updated version is a little bit better.


	2. Chapter 2

Peter laughed awkwardly at the tall man standing on his doorstep and ducked his head down to hide his embarrassed blush.

"Well, yeah. Sorry if it totally creeped you out."

The stranger held the paper in front of him and read aloud,

"Hi, my name is Peter Parker. I was wondering if you'd like to eat dinner with me? Room 113. If you want to, dinner will be ready around 7:30, if not don't worry about it."

Peter stared at his shoes, "I… don't really know why I did that, I guess you just seemed interesting and I really want to make some new friends, and I probably shouldn't have been all weird about it, sliding a note under your door is so juvenile and I…"

The man held up his hand to stop Peters babbling, "Easy there tiger. Call me Wade, your new best friend." He grinned at the smaller boy offering him his hand.

Peter's face lit up. He enthusiastically grabbed Wade's hand and started shaking it, "And I'm Peter, I'm new in town and-" Peter was cut off when Wade pulled his hand away. His good mood evaporated.

 _Of course I somehow messed up. Stupid, obnoxious, dumb social situations._

XxXxXxXx

Wade snatched his hand back in surprise. People didn't usually shake his hand, even when he offered it, and having this adorable man just reach out and grab his scarred hand with no problems at all was not what he expected. Peter had shown no hesitation in taking his hand which, quite frankly, was strange.

Wade looked up at Peter's hurt face and he felt his heart start to break at the sight of any distress coming from his baby boy.

 _Whoa, since when is he his baby boy? Where is all this possessiveness coming from?_

"Hey sweet Pete, don't look so sad, I'm just not used to people voluntarily touching me." He chuckled, trying to make the other man feel less upset.

"What? Why?" Peter asked, with an adorably confused expression on his face.

Wade gestured to his whole body, "See these scars? Most people freak out and avoid me at all costs," Wade leaned closer to Peter, "But, baby boy, why don't you seem scared?"

Peter scrunched up his face, "You're not scary." He said defiantly, his chin jutting out.

Wade leaned back and laughed, a full sounding genuine laugh.

"Alrighty then cutie, you just keep surprising me. I think we are in for an interesting dinner, don't you?" Wade sauntered into the kitchen/living room area with Peter trailing closely behind.

Pictures of anything and everything covered the walls, ranging from sunsets to random buildings or random people on the streets.

"I…I like taking photographs whenever something catches my attention." Peter said quietly. Wade heard a soft click from behind him. He spun around to see Peter holding a professional looking camera, that was pointed directly at Wade. He heard another click of the camera, before Peter lowered it and looked at him sheepishly.

"Wanna see?" Peter held the camera out towards Wade. Wade didn't even register the camera being offered to him, instead he looked Peter directly in the eyes. He could feel his heart beat quicken.

"Does this mean that I caught your attention baby boy?" He said careful not to let his voice crack.

 _Good God, feelings are totally not up my alley. Why in the ever-loving fuck is this brown-eyed bubble butt making me feel things?_

Weirdly enough though, Wade wasn't freaked out by the onslaught of gushy-mushy feelings. He just felt warm. Lame adjective sure, but it was the right one.

Peter just smiled a beautiful, innocent smile. And Wade felt something inside him squirm. He needed to be closer to this kind-hearted boy. The few feet of distance felt like miles. He stepped closer and again was surprised when Peter didn't step back.

Wade decided to test the limits a bit. He took another step closer, so their toes were touching, he hadn't noticed how much shorter Peter was until the boy had to crane his neck to look up at him.

Was he imagining it or did Peter's little pink tongue just sweep over his bottom lip?

Not sure if I'm making Wade crazy enough or Peter silly enough. Let me know what you think! Thanks for reading :)


	3. Chapter 3

Peter noticed that Wade looked a bit nervous but he couldn't pinpoint why. He licked his lips while he tried to figure out why in the world he would be nervous. _Maybe he doesn't like having his picture taken?_ Peter thought, _he does seem to be self-conscious about his appearance._

He looked down at their toes, seeing how close they were, his eyes trailed upwards following Wade's long legs up to his chest. He had an weird urge to place his head onto the other mans chest so he could hear his heartbeat.

 _I bet he would freak out though._ Peter thought glumly, _He doesn't seem to like being touched remember how he freaked out a bit when you shook his hand?_

Peter took a step back and shot the other man a friendly smile. "Of course you caught my attention! I don't just invite anybody into my house."

Wade's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "Really? And here I thought you had a flair for picking up strangers and offering to cook them dinner," He grinned, "But it's nice to know that I'm special."

Peter reddened slightly at the taller man's words. "Dinner's not set out yet, if you want you can watch some tv or something, while I finish up dinner." He motioned towards the couch facing a flat screen, since Peter's kitchen and living area were connected he could still see Wade which for some reason made him feel a bit better.

Wade walked over to the tv and started to ruffle through the movies and games carefully organized in a freestanding display case. Peter watched as Wade went through all his nerd gear nervously. Mary-Jane had always made fun of him for loving 'childish' games and he hoped Wade wouldn't be the same way.

Wade's hand stopped when they reached his old gameboy that still had Pokemon Fire Red in the cartridge slot. He picked it up and turned to look at Peter from across the room.

Peter cringed, waiting for the jab that was surely coming his way for having a game meant for twelve year old's in his house.

"Dude! Fire Red is the bomb, can I play? Don't worry I wont mess with what you already have, I just want to check out which starter you picked, because if it's Bulbasaur, I'm not sure this friendship is going to last."

Peter was so shocked he didn't register that he was replying, "Bulbasaur is a good starter in it's own right, but no, Squirtle is my favorite."

Wade smiled. "Baby boy, I think this really is the start of a beautiful and long friendship."

IM SO STUCK I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO SOMEONE PLS HELP. IDEAS ARE GREATLY APPRECIATED AND V HELPFUL.


	4. Chapter 4

_Alright._ Wade thought to himself. H _ow in the fuck did I end up here?_

His eyes shifted around, taking in all the little details of his odd situation. His head was awkwardly squished against the end of the sofa and his arm was asleep. He was very clearly _not_ on his own sofa, because this one was much softer. He looked down at his body and was surprised to find a well used and slightly worn in some places, blanket covering his legs. He squinted at the blanket and was able to make out the Ravenclaw house symbol.

 _Huh? Had someone...tucked him in? Using a Harry Potter blanket?_

He shifted his head and caught sight of a low table that had an assortment of old Nintendo games and beer bottles littered carelessly across the top of the smooth glass. His eyes lowered a bit more and he saw a bit of tousled brown hair sticking out of a thick purple comforter that completely hid the rest of the other person's body.

Wade shook his head and frowned. He knew he blacked out like a college freshman when he drank, but oddly enough he never got a hangover. He thought back to the previous night.

 _Sweet smiles, nerding out over Pokemon and Harry Potter, playing some sort of drinking game, watching Howl's Moving Castle...with Peter!_

So, he had slept over at Peter's house, and Peter had tucked him in when he passed out, but why didn't he go to his own bed? Why would he sleep on the floor?

Peter started to shift and then he let out a small moan as he woke up. Wade had to bite his lip to keep the answering moan in, because god, no one should sound that hot when they first wake up. Good god it was just one little moan and here he was acting like a teenage boy who couldn't control his damn hormones.

"Please, someone turn off the sun. It's trying to kill me." Peter whimpered, and Wade just laughed. His baby boy must have a raging hangover, and luckily Wade could help him.

Wade got up and shook out his arm trying to regain feeling in his fingers again, as he walked to the kitchen and got Peter a glass of water.

Peter had hauled himself up and was looking adorably confused. His hair sticking up in all directions and his eyes barely open. "Wade?" He said with a small voice.

Wade took a seat on the couch and handed Peter the glass, when the sleepy and hungover boy reached for it his shirt lifted up just a bit and Wade could see some black lines running down Peter's side, dipping over his hipbone and down his thigh.

 _Is it sharpie? Did I draw on him last night? Aw shit. I probably did, crap. He's totally gonna be pissed._

He cocked his head to the side slightly. _Oh well, might as well tell him now so he doesn't freak out later._

"Listen baby boy, I think I might've gotten a little too drunk last night...and well...drunk-wade seems to think he's pretty artistic and has been known to dabble in the delicate art of sharpie-ing people who pass out..."

Peter's face turned white. "D-do I have any on my face? Oh please, don't tell me I have whiskers again." He groaned loudly and dropped his head into his hands and Wade wasn't sure if it was embarrassment or the pounding headache that caused the action.

"Again? Oh my, my, just how often do you pass out from drinking?" Wade said with a grin, trying to stall just a little, because if he was being honest with himself, he was worried how Peter would react when he found out that Wade had most likely taken his shirt off to draw on him.

"Not that often but whenever I pass out it seems something happens to me. Sharpies, duct tape, awkward and embarrassing photos..." he trailed off, still not lifting his head.

"Well, it's not whiskers, but it might be worse." Peter's head snapped up and he clutched his head in pain after the sudden movement.

"owwwwww." Peter paused again and carefully opened his eyes and gave Wade a small smile, "Well, what is it then?"

Wade let the words rush out of his mouth before he could think to much about it,"I think I might've drawn on your chest, maybe?"

Peter frowned and looked down the neck of his t-shirt. "Are you trying to play a joke on me?" He said in a quiet voice.

Wade lifted his hand up in front of him, "No, no baby boy. I just saw some black on your skin and assumed I fucked up."

Peter looked him in the eye and sighed, he reached down and gripped the bottom of his shirt and started to lift it up.

Wade's mouth hung open as he drank in every inch that was slowly exposed to his hungry eyes.

Smooth, slightly tanned skin with a large tattoo was revealed. It was a gorgeous piece of art, both Peter's body and the tattoo of course.

A black spider, with its legs wrapped around Peter's right side and dropping below the waistline of his pants. The spider itself looked downright vicious. The tattoo was the illustrated version of the words, _Dangerous! Do not touch!,_ which was the complete opposite of the Peter he knew.

Wade whistled appreciatively, "Damn sweetie. That must've hurt like a bitch! Ribs are a pretty sensitive place to get inked, but you look sexy as hell." He winked at the now thoroughly confused Peter sitting on the floor in front of him.

"You think I'm sexy?" He said faintly, with a hint of disbelief coloring his words.

Uh...sorry it took so long, I'm not the best writer and all that... I really appreciated the reviews, thanks for all the ideas guys! They really helped me start to think about what direction I want to take this in!


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